Elegant Slacker Newsletter v.10
We are really proud of our work this week. If we could, we'd put it on the refrigerator, but alas, you can't put a magnet on a computer. We learned this lesson many times before. But this week's issue features a different history lesson. Our time killer, well, it's a time killer. Sit back, relax and enjoy the slack.
Elegant Slacker Vocabulary Words for the Week
Elegant Slacker Feature of the Week
"Elegant Moments In Slacking History -- 'I am currently otherwise engaged'"
In order to understand the future, one must certainly understand the past. ES has been commended as the paper of record for elegant slacking throughout the ages. In this semi-regular column, we honor those shining moments in elegant slacking history which impact our world today. Just after the industrial revolution, many workers found themselves trapped in factories with "newfangled" "machines." Tirelessly they labored in front of their mechanical counterparts and would trudge home tired and weary. Slack, let alone elegance, was a scarce commodity. Managers would demand more and more from their staffs. Historical transcripts from human resource exit interviews showed workers typically being let go for responding to managers with such colorful phrases as "No," "Go to hell," "Bollocks, do it yourself." And of course, there were those employees who were let go for simply refusing to any work. Then one day, on the manufacturing floor of a small firm on the south side of town, middle manager George McCallum asked Samuel Arliston to sweep the floor. Arliston was alleged to be in conversation with fellow coworkers, entertaining them with a bawdy tale of his previous evening's forays. With a calm, polite, yet forceful voice, Arliston looked McCallum in the eye and said," I'm currently otherwise engaged." McCallum simply nodded and asked someone else to perform the task. McCallum would later note that Arliston was an "assertive young gentleman" who's "demeanor was an asset to the company" and "should be considered for a job with a lower fatality rate." And so today we can learn from the lessons of Samuel Arliston and see the wisdom in his cutting edge elegance in slacking.
Elegant Slacker Weekly Time Killer
"Timely Trivia" Everyone likes to be an expert, or at least pretend to be one. With that in mind, an elegant slacker can derail otherwise productive conversations or create a buzz that will distract from work and other business place activities using trivia. The key to this time killer is to be sure to use timely and controversial trivia. 1. Browse the day's headlines, last night's television listings, the sports page or other contemporary data sources
2. Discover an angle of inquiry
3. When in the company of others, interject with "Hey did any one..." or "Can any one tell me..." or "What did you guys think of..." and relate it to the data item
4. If the answer is delivered too quickly, ask a clarification question such as "But what do your really think?" or "I am not sure I fully understand can you clarify your answer?"
5. Repeat as necessary, continuing with a slack connector like "Well, it sure got me...and so did [new data item]."
6. Return to step 3
Word 1: linchpin (n) (alt. linchpin)
Meaning (n): one that serves to hold together a set of elements
Example usage: If we removed the linchpin in the process may fall into disarray. Notes: When using linchpin, it is extremely important to be sure to properly enunciate all syllables. You may have said," I really wish we had a linchpin..." but it may be heard, by someone with ear wax, damaged tympanum, or ambient noise as "I really wish we had a lynchin'..." This is not elegant, not even in the south.
Meaning (n): one that serves to hold together a set of elements
Example usage: If we removed the linchpin in the process may fall into disarray. Notes: When using linchpin, it is extremely important to be sure to properly enunciate all syllables. You may have said," I really wish we had a linchpin..." but it may be heard, by someone with ear wax, damaged tympanum, or ambient noise as "I really wish we had a lynchin'..." This is not elegant, not even in the south.
Word 2: drive (v); drive (n)
Meaning (v): to steer or provide direction for; to navigate
Meaning (n): direction or motivation
Example usage (v): The meeting would have been a wash, had Chad not been there to drive us to resolution.
Example usage (n): Drive sometimes makes some of us continue pressing on, even in the face of utter failure. Notes: Drive is to the business world what patriotism is to politics. Never should your national loyalty be in question. Similarly, one's drive should never be called into doubt. Even suggesting someone "lack the drive" or "seem less driven" could be the death knell for one's career.
Meaning (v): to steer or provide direction for; to navigate
Meaning (n): direction or motivation
Example usage (v): The meeting would have been a wash, had Chad not been there to drive us to resolution.
Example usage (n): Drive sometimes makes some of us continue pressing on, even in the face of utter failure. Notes: Drive is to the business world what patriotism is to politics. Never should your national loyalty be in question. Similarly, one's drive should never be called into doubt. Even suggesting someone "lack the drive" or "seem less driven" could be the death knell for one's career.
"Elegant Moments In Slacking History -- 'I am currently otherwise engaged'"
In order to understand the future, one must certainly understand the past. ES has been commended as the paper of record for elegant slacking throughout the ages. In this semi-regular column, we honor those shining moments in elegant slacking history which impact our world today. Just after the industrial revolution, many workers found themselves trapped in factories with "newfangled" "machines." Tirelessly they labored in front of their mechanical counterparts and would trudge home tired and weary. Slack, let alone elegance, was a scarce commodity. Managers would demand more and more from their staffs. Historical transcripts from human resource exit interviews showed workers typically being let go for responding to managers with such colorful phrases as "No," "Go to hell," "Bollocks, do it yourself." And of course, there were those employees who were let go for simply refusing to any work. Then one day, on the manufacturing floor of a small firm on the south side of town, middle manager George McCallum asked Samuel Arliston to sweep the floor. Arliston was alleged to be in conversation with fellow coworkers, entertaining them with a bawdy tale of his previous evening's forays. With a calm, polite, yet forceful voice, Arliston looked McCallum in the eye and said," I'm currently otherwise engaged." McCallum simply nodded and asked someone else to perform the task. McCallum would later note that Arliston was an "assertive young gentleman" who's "demeanor was an asset to the company" and "should be considered for a job with a lower fatality rate." And so today we can learn from the lessons of Samuel Arliston and see the wisdom in his cutting edge elegance in slacking.
"Timely Trivia" Everyone likes to be an expert, or at least pretend to be one. With that in mind, an elegant slacker can derail otherwise productive conversations or create a buzz that will distract from work and other business place activities using trivia. The key to this time killer is to be sure to use timely and controversial trivia. 1. Browse the day's headlines, last night's television listings, the sports page or other contemporary data sources
2. Discover an angle of inquiry
3. When in the company of others, interject with "Hey did any one..." or "Can any one tell me..." or "What did you guys think of..." and relate it to the data item
4. If the answer is delivered too quickly, ask a clarification question such as "But what do your really think?" or "I am not sure I fully understand can you clarify your answer?"
5. Repeat as necessary, continuing with a slack connector like "Well, it sure got me...and so did [new data item]."
6. Return to step 3
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home